Today is the two-year anniversary of Dave and my wedding. This is the first time we've passed this milestone with a place to publicly celebrate, so I figured I'd remember the blessed event with a few photo highlights. Scrolling through the thousand or so pictures, it was fun to have a million different moments come back to me; I was just telling Marni that I made a list after the wedding called "Things I want to remember"; I wish I could remember where I put it, because the photos put me in the mood.
It's amazing how many different stories a group of photographs can tell- I'm aware of this every time I share an anecdote from Clio's world and choose the pictures that will illustrate it; surely I take liberties as the narrator, but this is not a fiction, it's a life. I worry, sometimes, about the changing nature of modern memory, and the fact that I am documenting enough of my daughter's life that some confusion between what she actually remembers and what she has seen and read on her blog is inevitable. It's funny to think how much meaning I am making just by the way I edit the pictures.
In terms of our wedding, perhaps each year on our anniversary I can go back to the photo archive and represent the day based on how I'm feeling at the time. The pictures above are two of the ones I already consider the "classic" or "signature" wedding pictures. I love these because they best represent what I remember feeling during the event: thrilled, giddy, a little bit out-of-body.
But looking at the lot of them two years later, and from this new position of wife and mother, I see something else: committing your life to someone is no small thing, and doing it in front of everyone you know ratchets up the pressure; it is nerve-wracking, it is stressful, and it is hugely anxiety-producing. Can you see it?
In a way, I'm glad to look back and realize that some part of me knew it was not all going to be a walk in the park. I'm glad we were scared and worried, but had enough belief in ourselves and our relationship to get into this thing anyway. It's worth it, every day. I think we knew that, too. Check us out:
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