Oh, my, how time is flying

It's amazing how busy you can be when you don't have a whole bunch of regular commitments, otherwise known as a job. It seems that, with more time than usual at your disposal, your center of gravity shifts and you simply slow down. The few things you have to do take up all your time, or, worse, you don't do them at all. You might even forget things, like returning emails, or that you have a blog that might still have some readers left.

We've been busy. We had a visit from Grandma and Grandpa. It was a long weekend at school, and on Thursday evening we went to the sculpture garden, had a picnic outside the Walker, and toured the galleries for free thursday night. Friday we headed to Stillwater with Nonny, where we checked out the Teddy Bear Playground and had lunch outside at the local burger joint. The rainy weekend brought pumpkin carving, a trip to the science museum, Clio's first trip to the Children's Theater (her delight should merit its own post), a big family dinner, and other activities I would have remembered if only I had blogged sooner.

We had the tile and under-counter lights installed in the kitchen, and they look great.

I considered (and continue to consider) rasberry-colored upholstery for the danish armchair in the living room. I sourced about 100 possible wallpapers for the living and dining rooms. Important work, I know.

I had a 4 1/2 hour interview for a job that I think I would like. No decision will be made until early December. You see how time just opens up before me? (I do not take this for granted. I know many mothers who would like nothing more than a break, some free days with their children in school. I am appreciative, even if I sometimes feel that I am waiting to see the shape life will take before doing much, before making decisions. Rather than beginning my life, I am waiting for my life to begin again.)

Dave started working part time at Whole Foods, and schedules became complicated.

Then Halloween was upon us. I had the girls on my own all weekend. There was last-minute costume hunting and making. There was a nighttime trip to Excelsior for the haunted trolley ride with cousins Finn and Lucia. Halloween morning we went, in costume, to the Children's Museum for Spooky Hollow, a "spooky" nighttime version of their Earth World exhibit. Then, of course, there was trick or treating. We lost Clio's Ladybug girl tutu, and she embraced just being a ladybug, instead. She was not bothered that her butterfly-like wings caused people not to know she was a ladybug. She just turned around so they could see her wings were, in fact red. That there were black spots.

Clio was, perhaps, the most enthusiastic trick or treater I have ever encountered. She bounded ahead to the next door (in our little neighborhood group, she was the biggest by more than a year, a fact she generally felt proud of, and considered herself the trailblazer.) At the first house they asked if she would like TWO pieces of candy; Clio took this as signal to request a second piece at future houses, until I caught wind of what she was up to. At some houses, the candy- hander-outers could not even get the door open, as a ladybug appeared to have attached herself to the outside of their screens, as ladybugs will do.

Dave came home from work just as I was adding layers to the girls outfits before going out for round two, so he got to experience the trick or treating and I got to hand out a tiny portion of the 5-lb bag of candy we had picked up at Costco. Eleri came home in tears because she did not like some of the masks ("it scares me"), but Clio went out for round three.

It must be fun to be four. So much enthusiasm. Things are new enough, but not brand new. She knows the ropes but has not lost interest. This is how it was earlier in the month, when she got her haircut, and when we went to the movies with Morgan and Greta. Big enough to not be completely awestruck or nervous, little enough to be utterly delighted. (At the movie, 7-year old Morgan said to her Mom, "I think Clio is enjoying this the most.")

You may notice that my thoughts are scattered. This is not an isolated incident: I think this is the other thing that happens when you have time. You can lose focus. I am deadline-oriented; I think I need a sense of urgency sometimes to get things done. And I think that often over the past few years writing on this blog has been a handy escape for me. A pleasurable way to work out some of the struggles of being a busy working mom, of resolving all the change and transition. Right now, here I am, with nothing to escape from, and not much to work out. This is a privileged position, but also a strange one for me. We'll see what i make of it as it plays out, I suppose.