On Hair

Clio got a haircut.
At first, I did not react well.
I wrote the following blogpost, then found myself unsure of whether it said what I want to say.
In the spirit of authenticity, I am posting it now anyway.
Here goes:

People are always saying how much they like Clio's hair. This surprises me a little: the color is really a mousy brown or, at best, a dirty blond; the texture can never quite decide on waves or curls; and there are some weird colicks going on at the crown that creates strange fullness in random directions. But the wildness of it was appealing, the lack of a part, the volume that occasionally made her look, strangely enough, like a pint-sized Brigitte Bardot.

Today, Clio got a hair cut; she went with Dave, and when they caught up to Eleri and I at Target and she declared, "Mom, I don't have long hair!" I nearly cried. Despite the fact that Clio is perfectly happy, that the shorter hair will be more comfortable in the heat and easier to get a comb through, I can admit that I still hate it.

Why? let's explore:

1. A Trend: little girls often have the same haircut as their mothers. I noticed this is Clio's music class, where Grace and her mom had the same pageboy style, Petra an her mom shared a mod-ish pixie, and Clio and I had the longest hair in the group. Is this because we want to make our children in our own image? Perhaps because our children might look like us, and therefore look good in the same styles? (Clio wears all "my" colors very well). Or maybe it's just a reflection on what we're into at the time, and the trend trickles down to our offspring.

2. The Long hair/ Short hair dichotomy: like the archetypes of Madonna/Whore, women have been categorized for years by the length of their hair. The long-haired sexpot. The short-haired tomboy. Long= bohemian and free spirited. Short= studious and responsible. In a way, I'm surprised that Betty and Veronica weren't differentiated by hair length instead of color (though, as a passable redhead I've always been glad to sidestep the Blond/Brunette dichotomy- maybe that' why I longed for red-headed children?). Gone is our pint-sized Brigitte, replaced instead by Bernice Bobs her Hair.

3. Women's Lib: it seems like the shaved head has become a device to indicate a woman's freedom from the "male gaze" and the sexual identity embodied in her 'do. That experimentation with shape and color is all about claiming your own identity and flying in the face of men's desire and conventional standards of beauty. I have shaved my head. I have dyed it black and blonde and eggplant and flame. I have straightened my bangs and teased out an afro, trying them on for size, looking in the mirror to see if I was the same person now, and now, and now.

I don't think I care that Clio and I no longer have the same hairstyle.
I don't think I worry about what short hair "means."
And while I don't think this idea of liberation does or should apply to children, I do care (though I shouldn't if she doesn't) that this haircut doesn't look like "her."

Okay- that was the end.
A few days have passed, and i will say: it's actually pretty cute. It's much easier to wash, and doesn't even require a comb. It is much cooler in our hot (but now not) whether. In fact, it makes me feel like my own hair is waaaay tooooo loooong.

Here she is: